How Do You Handle Interruptions

by Silvia Uribe

Do you see them as a waste of your precious time? Or do you see them as a nice break to learn something new, spur creativity or to divert tiredness and boredom?

People's reactions in general, both mine and those of others' are one of the multiple things that I love to observe. It is amazing to see that no matter where each one of us comes from, our shared human condition shows when we react to a variety of external triggers, with the ever so familiar expressions of laughter, annoyance, surprise, or anger to name just a few. However, variations to these reactions are endless, and according to those who know, they are usually based on the individual's personality and on cultural differences. This is the case with the way people handle interruptions. Each person reacts differently, however I've noticed some "regional" commonalities.

For instance, I'm used to interruptions. It is the way I was raised, I think. I would venture to say that in most Latin American countries children don't have the luxury of telling their parents or their teachers to wait. When adults tell children to do something, it is usually not a suggestion and children are supposed to "obey" immediately, no matter if they're busy doing something else. My parents were very loving, but when they counted one, two, I knew that before three seconds had passed I was expected to drop whatever I was doing and do as I was told. Taking these stop and go training into consideration, which fosters a quick response, as well as other cultural facts which promote a spontaneous, lively, at times impatient, spare of a moment type of behavior, one doesn't have to wonder how come differences in behavior can be at times so vast between the American and the Latino ways. It was a surprise for me in the beginning, to watch how concentrated and devoted to the task at hand some Americans can be. Sometimes, I wish my mind would work in such a focused, organized way, but it seems impossible! I, like many other Latinos I know, tend to disperse my attention on several things at a time. For instance, when I am in the middle of the hallway talking, say with a co-worker and someone I know passes by, I will at least say hello to that person, and we might exchange a couple of words, obviously interrupting my previous conversation. Some Americans might be bothered by this at times, but for a Latina like me, it would be completely inadmissible to "ignore" a person's presence, more so if I know him or her. By the same token, when - say an employee at the counter - is helping a customer and I have a quick question, it is difficult and seems unfair to have to wait ten minutes until the other person has been helped, when I only have a question that requires a yes or no answer.

However, after all these years of exposure to the American focused way of conducting business, I got used to it, and I can not only see some benefits, but I can also take advantage of them. I have to admit that because of this I've exercised my patience, and it has improved quite a bit. As I keep developing my focusing abilities, I'm still disperse when it's beneficial, like right now, when I'm at work with several projects on my desk at a time, plus planning, over the phone, a shopping day with my daughter to get her Prom dress and accessories, and at the same time, trying to meet the self-imposed deadline for this article. No doubt, the combination of both cultures has enriched me.

So yes, I have to confess that I do not only welcome interruptions, but I procure them. Actually, monotony at work, in my day, or in life kills me! While I am not ADHD, the fact is that being the people person that I am, plus a very curious human being, accepting interruptions as a regular part of my day has enabled me to establish relationships, and learn about many things that otherwise I would not have.

Uh, excuse me a minute, someone's knocking on my door ...

Silvia Uribe is a freelance writer with a Latino perspective.

Cross-posted at Edhat.com

Hell Came After Havoc...

by Silvia Uribe

Imagine this: It is a Friday and Christmas is just a week away. The owner of "Ecstasy," a small boutique filled with leather clothes, and accessories for women is opening the door at 10am. The store is completely re-stocked for the last days of the season. The streets are quite empty since shoppers usually take a half an hour or so to get to the stores, reach for their credit cards, and shoot their signature left and right. Three men walk from across the street directly towards the boutique. The owner of the store sees them and something tells her they're up to no good. She rushes to the double French door to close it, but it's too late. As she is closing it, one of the men, in a fast move, puts his foot between the door and the frame, making it impossible for her to close it while with one of his hands he pushes the door open for him and his accomplices to step in. He is concealing a gun in his jacket. The man is literally two inches away from the store owner when he takes his weapon out and points it to her stomach area. "Do what you're told, and you won't be hurt", she heard the man say. Time stops and from that point on she feels as though everything is happening in slow motion. Although the men seem to know what they're doing, she notices that the one touching her abdomen with the gun is very nervous, shaking violently. She is afraid that he will shoot her inadvertently. She dares to speak to the man. "Calm down. Take everything, just don't hurt us", she said, referring to herself and her employee, who was in the back room while this was happening.

From there, havoc! She is ordered to go to the back room, as two more men join the others. Those men have large weapons with them, the military type. One of them, handing his rifle to one of his peers inside, stays casually outside while the rest of them are busy ripping the walls of the store naked, and putting everything in trash bags. They demand from the women to take off their jewelry and lay it on the ground without looking at them. The store owner is ordered to hand them the keys to her car, and her purse. Inside the purse was her I.D. with her address, and the keys to her home. She complies. The men are moving as fast as they can; they are yelling at each other and at her for more money. There's no more, and they threaten to kill her. She's sure she's going to die. She sees that one of them leaves a gun on a couch, within her reach. In a matter of seconds, a thousand considerations come to her mind. She feels that she could get the guy that's "watching" them, but decides against it because the three men on the other side of the wall would easily turn around and shoot her. She continues cooperating. Before they leave, they threaten her again and tell her not to move from the back room for five minutes. They take the merchandise, her car and her purse with them, however the most precious thing they took from her was her emotional stability.

I was that store owner in my hometown, and after these events life became hell for me and my family for a couple of years. I started having problems with my husband who was unable to make me feel safe, although he did everything in his power and then more. I was unable to sleep a full night, and I was growing more and more impatient with my then, two year old daughter. Don't even ask how I felt about walking on a lonely street or when someone approached or spoke to me from behind. During that time, there was no one to help me navigate the complicated legal system, or who could give me any information on the investigation or the prosecution of the case. I needed someone who could help me get restitution, or at the very least, some financial assistance to pay for the therapy that I desperately needed to reduce my fears of these men getting to my home and to my family.

Traditionally, criminal justice systems have overlooked the needs of the victims, solely focusing in the criminals, and in taking them out of the streets. Fortunately, this is not the case in Santa Barbara County. Since 1980, the District Attorney's Office has served victims of crime, being one of the first in the State and the Nation to have a Victim Witness Unit devoted to assist, inform, explain, and provide support and referrals to them, and to offer State Victim Compensation that can pay for some of the victims' needs, when they are eligible.

It is good to know that thanks to this program, victims of crime and their families in our county can have the guide, support and information they need to start their healing process and recovery as soon as they're ready to do it.

In observance of National Victims' Rights Week, the SB County District Attorney's Office is hosting the "Justice for Victims, Justice for All" conference on April 17th, at the Marriott Hotel in Buellton 8:30 - 3:00, which includes two panels and a Award luncheon. For information call 682-0702.

Silvia Uribe is a freelance writer with a Latino perspective.

Cross-posted at Edhat.com

When Fear, Terrorism & Earthquakes Strike...

by Silvia Uribe

Talking to my daughter, a senior at Dos Pueblos High School, I realized the effect that the struggles of our days have on our youth, which took me by surprise. She was talking about the Mexican news broadcast images of a terrorist bomb exploding in broad daylight in the middle of Mexico City, our hometown. Her expression was not the relaxed, smiley one that she usually has, and as the conversation progressed her eyes became watery; her breathing became fast, as if she had just come back from her afternoon run, and she kept looking at me in fear, waiting for a comforting answer to her question. She asked, "Where will we go if things become so dangerous here in the States due to terrorism." In her mind, she figured that if the situation would ever get really dangerous here, we could go to Mexico, where most of our family resides, to get away from a possible attack. Now, with this terrorist event, she felt not only fear for our family's safety, but also a sense of loss of what she perceived as "our safe heaven." She was about to start crying. Realization hit me then. Our youth live in constant fear, and we don't know it. The kind of fear that cripples minds, limits wills, and destroys the desire to go ahead and try to make dreams come true. What for, if sooner or later everything could be destroyed? Yes, in the U.S., fear and depression have taken over our youth; the future of our country, and we have inadvertently allowed it!

Even though I didn't know how to make her feel reassured, it was clear to me that she needed to gain some perspective on the issue, so I shared with her that for me, the word, the concept and the consequences of terrorism were way more familiar and less threatening. Having family also living in Spain, I grew up hearing about the ETA, a Basque terrorist organization formed in the late 50's which is still very active now. I grew up knowing that every so often the terrorists would attack; that the attack would almost always kill some people, and that those attacks would never become something constant. As a society, we have another word for constant terrorism, we call it war. Terrorism, in order to work as such, needs to have the surprise element on its side. So, no, I don't fear that it would make me move from my town, or that it would become so frequent that my plans for the future will be cut short, or that my children and one day my grandchildren would for sure become victims themselves. Having said this, I sadly admitted that no one is inoculated against a terrorist attack, and that anyone could become its victim. My daughter wanted to know more.

Most of the world has co-existed with terrorism for many years, even though some people, our youth included, may think that this is a new trend. From the first centuries A.D. with the Zealots of Judea, which the Romans knew as "sicarii" to our days, terrorism has always been present, causing instability and fear within the population. I did a little research on the known terrorist organizations active today. According to the CDI (Center for Defense Information) this is a list per country and number of terrorist organizations: Afghanistan (1), Algeria (2), Cambodia (1), Chile (1), Colombia (3), Egypt (2), Georgia (1), Greece (3), Honduras (1), India (1), Iraq (3), Israel (1), Japan (3), Lebanon (2), Northern Ireland (6), Occupied Territories (4), Pakistan (4), Peru (2), Phillippines (3), Rwanda (1), Sierra Leona (1), South Africa, Spain (2), Sri Lanka, Siria (2), Turkey (2), United States (1), Uzbekistan (1). Fifty four terrorist organizations altogether, some in existence for over fifty years and the world has been able to coexist with it, and fight it quite effectively.

I asked my daughter to compare the threat of terrorism to living in a seismic zone. Earthquakes are not under our control. We know that they may happen, but we don't know when, and we do our best to be prepared to respond when they hit our area. We also know they could be deadly, yet we conduct our lives every day in a normal fashion, and we make plans for the future, as if the possibilities of an earthquake were remote. I realize that this comparison is quite a simplistic way of looking at terrorism, but knowing that there is not a real solution that would end the threat, it may be a good way for us to cope with it, and still live a life without fear, and have hope for the future.

Our conversation ended as they usually do, when her phone rang and she took the call. Minutes later, with a smile again on her face she gave me a hug, and a kiss and said "Thank you mom, I'll be back soon."

Silvia Uribe is a freelance writer with a Latino perspective.

Cross-posted at Edhat.com

Super Tuesday

By Silvia Uribe

As much as I wanted to stop hammering on people's eyes, ears, and minds about this never ending, and still long presidential campaign, I just have to recognize that it has been fascinating to watch our democratic process's wheels turn as they have. Do you think there have been surprises so far? What about Bill Clinton, who seems he has lost some of his touch, and frankly his sharpness, mental agility, and wit? (I am a little concerned for his health in general.) Reading between lines, don't you think that Republicans might prefer Obama over Clinton to win the primaries, so they can more easily sweep him at the national election? And what about the dirty tricks, the manipulation, the media doing its part with the air time each candidate gets during the debates, plus the strategies and the money campaigns put to work? To me, all of these are both entertaining and desolating at the same time.

We are almost ready for "Super Tuesday" on Feb 5th. We hear a bunch of well spoken words, but are they well explained or backed up? For instance, the "change" that Barack Obama's followers (so naively) hope for, and that he talks about all the time, is it something real or just empty words on his part? What exactly does he mean? We should ask ourselves for example, where is the money for his campaign coming from? What kind of concessions will he have to make as a pay back, if he in fact becomes president? I see nothing different from the rest of the candidates here. I also wonder...when Obama speaks about grass roots and his compromise with these kind of movements, what is he really talking about and why are people so pumped up by it? After his days as a community organizer, how has he supported grass roots movements, organizations or activism in general? On the other hand, his comments are getting personal and ugly, and he might have already shown an attitude problem by looking away from Hillary at the "State of the Union." Do you see anything really different in his deeds? And what about the celebrities who support him, and their shallow reasons for doing it, like Oprah's who by her own words, doesn't understand about politics but she just "believes in him". Caroline Kennedy's only reason, by her own explanation is because her son, now eighteen, is excited about voting and "feels inspired" by Obama. Is that enough to endorse, and trust an individual to be in the highest position of our country? What a disappointment! We all got excited the first time we voted, remember? Wouldn't you say that Caroline could do better than that, and that she would have more expectations and a greater vision for what a presidential candidate should be, other than an inspirational speaker? I guess not.

I have to admit that Ted Kennedy's support was definitely a move that could weigh in on some Democrats' decision, but if you're one of those Democrats that I'm referring to, let me ask you, have you looked at the individual's history? What are his positions on abortion, energy policy, or foreign affairs, for instance? Ted Kennedy has been a senator for 46 years, how do you think he has been able to remain in his position for all those years? I wonder...would you find out that he is an excellent politician, or one who's only committed to politics?

Now, it is pretty much a "two men" race on both sides. The bids are open! Like many others, I wonder too...which will be the finalists for each party? Who will Huckabee, Paul, and Edwards endorse? And finally, what's your educated guess for the final ticket on each party?

The real question here shouldn't be who do we like best, but who is better able to effectively lead our country?

Silvia Uribe is a freelance writer with a Latino perspective.

Cross-posted at Edhat.com